“The question is not so much ‘What do I learn from stories?’ as “What stories do I want to live?” suggests Zen teacher David Loy. What story meanings that you have heard throughout your lifetime do you want to live?
In Greek mythology stories, Sisyphus was punished by the gods with a sentencing to roll a boulder up a hill for eternity, only to have it roll back down every time he came close to the hilltop. Sisyphus was the Greek king of Ephyra (later named Corinth). According to one version of the story, Sisyphus was a tyrant who angered Greek gods by killing his visitors as a show of his power. He disobeyed xenia, a law of hospitality, considered vital to Greek culture both morally and politically.
One meaning of this myth is that life is an endless struggle, with no opportunity to ever achieve a goal. This is a hopeless version. According to some research, only 8% achieve their New Year’s goals by the end of the year. Is this true about you? All of us experience some stiff uphill climbs to reach certain goals, only to backslide, sometimes repeatedly, when “things” do not work out. Yet, there could be lessons, such as asking, “What is my part in this?” A second meaning of the Sisyphus myth is the importance of perseverance when one is faced with adversity. No story has only two sides. There are other meanings. Take your pick.
For now, let’s go with the second meaning. I’m a big believer in resilience and hope. One of my graduate school professors was keen on reminding newbie psychologists of the most important thing to accomplish by the end of each therapy session: “leave the client with hope.” I often reminded myself of this early lesson when in the middle of contentious family therapy sessions. If one’s therapist gives up, how can the client walk out the door with a silver-lining sliver of hope for themselves?
Recent recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom, conservationist Jane Goodall is another proponent of hope: “I do have reasons for hope: our clever brains, the resilience of nature, the indomitable human spirit, and above all, the commitment of young people when they’re empowered to take action.” Each generation holds out hope that the next generation will be more talented in fixing what ails families, communities, and countries. We will leave the younger set many hills to climb, but we can engender hope in them by continuing to be steady climbers ourselves.
Do not see your goals as Sisyphean or goals that are futile; see progress in taking baby steps. Babies do not give up when they learn to stand and take their first fledgling steps. They get up, repeatedly, and take their next best step.
Pearls of Peace (PoP) Quiz
357. What stories do you live by?
358. If you have lost hope, what is one baby step you can take in reviving a sense of hope for our collective future?
Pearls of Peace: A Family Psychologist’s Circle-of-Life Blog 