Tag: psychology

“Fast” Talkers Live Longer

The Berlin Aging Study (BASE) is a multidisciplinary (sociology, psychology, psychiatry, and internal medicine) study of seasoned citizens (my name for older adults) between ages of 70-105. Initially, detailed information was gathered for 258 men and 258 women who lived in Berlin. The longitudinal research originated under the direction of the late German psychologist Paul B. Baltes and German sociologist Karl Ulrich Mayer. Along with his American psychologist wife, Margret Baltes, Paul Baltes viewed lifespan development in terms of “plasticity” in cognitive abilities, a context of adaptation, and multidisciplinary factors such as one’s biology, family, schooling, religious affiliation, and profession. The Baltes couple promoted successful aging through optimizing one’s cognitive functions and the ability to adapt to change, including loss. Research supported their belief that cognitive abilities can continue to develop in late adulthood with participation in stimulating activities. A current longitudinal study (BASE II) of 1600 seasoned citizens (ages 60-80) is underway at the Max Planck Institute for Human Development in Germany.

BASE research results are fascinating. General intelligence did not predict who might live longest. Instead, verbal fluency was key in long-living folks. The participants with low (versus high) verbal fluency had a median survival time that was 9 years shorter! Verbal fluency requires broad abilities, including fast information retrieval and a crystallized knowledge base. One only hopes that a fast-talking individual possesses a truthful knowledge base.

Here are a few pointers for increasing your verbal fluency. Heather Hurlock, Founder and Editor of Super Age (an online source of health and wellbeing), names the first three well-established ones.

  • Read out loud. This suggestion also is endorsed by a 30-minute-daily program, StrongerMemory, for those in mild cognitive decline. Do not wait for cognitive deficits to appear to make a reading-out-loud practice for yourself! You will build on articulation and rhythm skills when you read to yourself or others. Both skills link to verbal fluency.
  • Hand-write often. While cursive is being dropped from many elementary schools, I believe that is a mistake. There is evidence that suggests learning cursive handwriting is helpful in one’s overall learning and retention. Handwriting (but not typing) is related to letter processing which translates to successful reading in youngsters. Also, handwriting is part of the StrongerMemory workbook exercises. https://goodwinliving.org/strongermemory-the-fight-against-cognitive-decline/
  • Think (and take deep breaths) before you speak. Take mindful pauses to provide your brain with a chance to retrieve some linking thoughts. Not only will this increase your confidence level, but it may enlist a better (or more humorous) verbal outcome.
  • Give speeches or read a poem (as in open-mic venues). You have talents to share and your brain will reward you for using a variety of sensory inputs.
  • Talk regularly; ask people questions. You may surprise yourself with what you can learn about others in a few sentences.

Have fun talking!

Pearls of Peace (PoP) Quiz

413. When is the last time you wrote a letter by hand?

414. How might you practice your verbal fluency in a new way?        

Attachment in Words

Are you aware of how your words land on a listener’s ear? Words can be like poison arrows or love letters. Both your flying-missile words and thoughtful spoken or written words of caring have staying power. They are not taken back easily. Words can boomerang across generations.

Whose words are you speaking on a regular basis? We do not ask ourselves this question, as we may not be aware of the answer.  I can recall the stunned look on a client’s face when she admitted that she suddenly caught herself “sounding just like her mother” in a heated exchange with her feisty teenager in my therapy office. Her insight provided an incredible starting place for real change in the parent-child relationship. Admitting that her lashing-out response was not what she had intended, but it just “slipped out,” was a healing moment for broader family dynamics.

Much of the time adults attempt to manage activated parts of their personalities with little recognition that they replicate another’s response patterns. Generations share not only DNA but some embedded ways of speaking to one another. Rage reactions do not “come out of the blue,” but often are solidly anchored in caretaker attachment issues. Early relationships in childhood can set the pace for later attachments.

Neuropsychiatrist Dan Siegel suggests that (as early as age 7) children pick up on attachment patterns of adults in their world. Based on the early theory of British psychiatrist John Bowlby and later research by American-Canadian psychologist Mary Ainsworth and others, there are four attachment patterns. Here are representative take-away words from each pattern:

  • Secure — “People will respect what I say.”
  • Avoidant/dismissive – “I did not get what I needed; I don’t need anybody for anything.”
  • Anxious/ambivalent – “I don’t know if you are my friend or not.”
  • Disorganized – “I can’t regulate my emotions; I fragment. Under stress I can’t think straight.”

Michigan poet Will Carleton cautions: “Boys flying kites haul in their white winged birds; you can’t do that when you’re flying words. ‘Careful with fire,’ is good advice we know. ‘Careful with words,’ is ten times doubly so.”

Dan Siegel believes that parents are capable of creating secure attachments with their children even if they did not receive such caring from their caretakers. The key is being aware of an honest and coherent narrative of one’s own upbringing.

Siegel’s 4 S’s remind us how to foster secure attachments. ALL adults can improve their approach to family life and work life. Employers, heads up!

What a different world we would have if parents and employers had secure attachments!

Pearls of Peace (PoP) Quiz

367. What are your words for making sense of your childhood?

368. How do you view your attachment pattern today?